Thranduil and his Deer happy happy every day!
i AM SO GLAD THIS GIF EXISTS
#FROM THE DEEPEST ICIEST CHASMS OF MIDDLE EARTH #SOMEONE QUESTIONS THE PATERNAL LINE OF ARAGORN #SON OF ARATHORN #SON OF VALANDIL #THE HEIR TO ISILDUR #SON OF ELENDIL #FATHERED BY AMANDIL OF NUMENOR #SON OF VARDAMIR #DESCENDED FROM ELROS #BROTHER OF ELROND #SON OF EARENDIL #SON OF TUOR #WHERE IS THE IGNORANT SWINE #I SHALL EDUCATE HIM PRESENTLY
no wonder Legolas left home to join the Fellowship, his dad is super weird and their house is in a spooky scary old forest full of giant spiders and amnesia rivers.
“Dad I can’t sleep, there’s a huge talking spider under my bed and it will not shut up.”
“Oh just ignore it Legolas, all they want is attention.”
my headcanon here is that legolas is just BARELY visibly holding it together
since canon tells us that mirkwood elves like to party and are fully capable of passing out from drunk
so legolas is using EVERYTHING HE HAS to fuck with gimli and pretend he hasn’t a clue what it’s like to be affected by alcohol
while inside he’s all ‘sdkla;hgsj you can do this leggles you can do this’
‘don’t think about that time you blacked out from dorwinion wine while naked in the middle of an impromptu archery contest’
‘and all your friends drew orc penises on your face’‘and when you woke up you were halfway to dale without a clue as to how you got there’
‘And especially don’t think about that time you drank so much that the dwarves you were supposed to be watching escaped in the empty barrels of wine.’
‘Dad never let me hear the end of that one’
90% of Legolas’s motivation is to fuck with Gimli, let us be real.
okay so my dad finally found his copy of the two towers and oh mY GOD IT LOOKS LIKE A ROMANCE NOVEL I CAN’T STOP LAUGHINFG WHENEVER I SEE IT
LOO K AT LEGOLAS’ MULLET CZKLANXNKSKAHX AND GIMLI’S JUST STARIUNG INTO THE DISTANCE
OH THERE IT IS, THIS IS THE COVER I KEEP GOING ON AND ON ABOUT!! I used to own this exact copy, I have no idea where it went to, and when I first read the book I was constantly flipping it over going “wow okay so the INSIDE of this book is my favorite thing ever but what the FREAK IS GOING ON ON THIS COVER”. Let romance cover Legolas softly caress your stony heart into loving him, Gimli, because he’ll never give up.
Haaaah, I have this paperback! The thing that always got me about it was Legolas’ terrible wig. WIIIIIIG.
Oh, my God. My. God.